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Three months flew by like a penguin in water

September 16, 2011

In just a few more hours, this blog turns 90 days old.

On the one hand, that’s a good thing because I can finally apply to join the BlogHer community. It also means I’ve been building up the blog and have several stories for anyone new who comes along and wants to read. I’ve accomplished and learned a lot in the past three months, trying things and testing things that I otherwise never would have attempted.

On the other hand, it also means this project is nothing like what I expected or planned it to be. Sometime in the past month, I came to the realization that I should have started this blog roughly two years ago in order to support the project now. Two years ago, though, this project and the blog wouldn’t have occurred to me, and I was at a point in my life where I wouldn’t have started them.

I’m getting the question more often lately: “How’s that kissing thing going?”

Uh, well. Beats me?

Thing is, I don’t know how to judge the progress of the project because I have no standard or measuring stick for comparison. I’m working on the areas where I’m strong (content ideas and creation) and trying to fill in the gaps where I’m not strong (media savvy, connections). I’m learning fast, but not fast enough for my liking.

To be honest, I’m discouraged. I fell into a trap of waiting for a long time, and nothing ever came of it — that first kiss never happened. And now I’ve come up with an idea to motivate myself to make it happen no matter what, and I’m falling into more waiting traps. Normally I love irony, and really it’s great until it kicks me in the teeth.

I can’t help but think that, somewhere out there, Godot is laughing at me.

Discouraged, however, doesn’t come anywhere close to meaning defeated. It just means I need to stop scowling and pouting at the roadblocks and get out the jackhammer. I’m not a terribly assertive person, which is a big part of what landed me in this no-kiss mess to begin with, so it’s time for me to learn some new tricks.

(Oh, and if you’re wondering what the water-speed velocity of an unladen penguin is, you’re as much of a geek as I am.)


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